Skip to content

Movies That Are Not Very Good, But Are Still Very Cool

29
Share

Movies That Are Not Very Good, But Are Still Very Cool

Home / Movies That Are Not Very Good, But Are Still Very Cool
Movies & TV bad movies

Movies That Are Not Very Good, But Are Still Very Cool

"Cool" is a ubiquitous and highly subjective concept; what to make of films that fail in so many ways, but still manage to capture the essence of cool?

By

Published on August 13, 2024

29
Share
Collage of three close-up shots from movies: Willem Dafoe in Streets of Fire, Roh Jeong-eui in Badland Hunters, and Antonio Banderas in The 13th Warrior

The evolving definition of the world cool has made it one of the most popular and most subjective slang terms in the English language. At this point, no standard dictionary definition can adequately cover what cool means. Attempts to summarize the possible variations always end with a vague “etc.”. Even the most recent Word of the Year1 featured a new spin on it. Describing a movie as cool can be even trickier, since one’s experience of a film depends not only on what happens onscreen, but the viewer’s frame of mind at the time.

Still, I like this list of possible definitions from the National Endowment for the Arts (though it still ends with the obligatory etc.): “self-possessed, disengaged, quietly disdainful, morally good, intellectually assured, aesthetically rewarding, physically attractive, fashionable”. So, for a movie to be cool, it would need to demonstrate some of these qualities in the images, characters, themes, or overall tone. A simpler way of putting it: something cool would make you call it out as such right away. You’d want to try that cool gadget, or wear those cool clothes, or drive that cool car, or hang out with (or even be like) those cool characters. Think of the opening scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, when young Indy immediately adopts the fashion and mannerisms of one of his adversaries. We see, in that moment, the joy and awe in the young man’s eyes.

There are some movies that I cannot exactly describe as good, but which arguably overcome that by being cool. This is not the same category as “so bad it’s good,” as I would not necessarily watch such a film to laugh at it. Nor are these movies in the category of “the critics were dead wrong, and here’s why!” These are, instead, movies that have obvious flaws that may have ruined their chances with audiences and critics at the time of their release. But, with the passage of time, we recognize and appreciate their coolness. Here are a few examples:

Streets of Fire (1984)2

For this relatively simple rescue-the-princess story, director Walter Hill envisioned a rock-infused neo-noir set in a dystopian urban universe ruled by gangs and corrupt police. “A rock & roll fable,” the tagline says, set in “another time, another place.” Ellen Aim (Diane Lane), lead singer of a popular band, gets kidnapped by the Bombers, who take her to their hideout. An ex-soldier named Tom (Michael Pare), with the help of auto mechanic McCoy (Amy Madigan), journeys into the city’s underworld to find her. The resulting turf war culminates in a duel (fought with…sledge hammers?) between Tom and the Bombers’ leader (Willem Dafoe).

Why it’s not that good: Hill’s insistence on casting relative unknowns brought in one gem in Lane, and a very handsome but inexperienced actor in Pare, who has the thankless task of sharing the screen with the hyper-charismatic Dafoe. Despite this being a rock fable, Ellen Aim’s opening song is a bit of a dud, and the pacing of the movie turns into a slog by the midpoint. Overall, the ambition of the film does not live up to the finished product, which is one of the reasons why it took a while for the movie to gain a cult following.

Why it’s still cool: Look, Willem Dafoe is the bad guy, so we’re pretty much done here. But in addition to that, the ambitious design of the film, with a minimum of expository worldbuilding, is a sight to behold, a fusion of ’80s neon and ’50s greaser fashion. The bad guys have Elvis haircuts! The cops drive Studebakers! Hill was the perfect director to experiment with this setting, given his previous work on other urban underworld stories like The Warriors and 48 Hrs. And, although the opening number is forgettable, the score by Ry Cooder is fantastic. Near the end of the film, a Motown group (featuring Robert Townsend in one of his first roles) sings “I Can Dream About You,” which became a hit in its own right for the songwriter, with its own iconic music video. As a result, even one of the negative reviews of the film conceded, “It’s probably impossible not to enjoy the movie.”

Trancers (1984)

In the 23rd century, a cop with the hilariously awesome name of Jack Deth (Tim Thomerson) is tasked with hunting trancers, zombie-like slaves who serve an evil master called Whistler (Michael Stefani). When Whistler evades the law by time-traveling back to the 20th century, Deth follows. There, he falls in love with a punk rock fan named Lena (Helen Hunt), who joins his quest to stop Whistler’s plan to alter the course of history.

Why it’s not that good: There are times when a low budget can be charming, and there are times when it simply looks cheap. Unfortunately, the trancers for whom the movie is named resemble background extras from a C-grade zombie movie—a wasted opportunity. Also, some might find Deth’s mannerisms to be a little too close to the hard-boiled Philip Marlowe archetype, and therefore a bit tiresome. That said…

Why it’s still cool: Tim Thomerson rules. He’s a handsome and authentic tough guy who has done the heavy lifting in roles like this for years. (As a bonus feature for this list, consider the even-lower-budget Dollman, in which Thomerson plays yet another badass enforcer.) The script gives Thomerson two unique sci-fi devices to play with. First, the time-travel tech allows a person to move backward into the past by taking over the body of a direct ancestor, which raises some interesting questions about ethics and identity. Second, Deth uses a tchotchke that can temporarily slow the passage of time, allowing him to rush through a dangerous situation while everyone else is virtually frozen, kind of like Quicksilver in the X-Men movies. Call them Chekhov’s gadgets. Both help to make the plot fun and original, despite the obvious debt it owes to Blade Runner and The Terminator. And one of the sequels (yes, there are many) has this awesome subtitle: Deth Lives.

The 13th Warrior (1999)

A Beowulf adaptation, directed by John McTiernan (Die Hard), based on a Michael Crichton novel, and featuring a surprising cross-cultural exchange between Vikings and Arabs—who wouldn’t want to see that? Here, the story unfolds through the eyes of Ahmad ibn Fadlan (Antonio Banderas), loosely based on a real-life traveler of the same name, who chronicled his journeys from Baghdad into Europe. Ibn Fadlan is recruited to join a band of warriors who are fighting a horde of monsters that can attack without warning. Despite his training as a scholar, and despite the hazing from the boisterous, fearless Vikings, ibn Fadlan rises to the occasion to face the menace.

Why it’s not that good: The opening credits list two directors, but that’s only a small clue regarding the chaotic nature of the filming. By all accounts, the initial cuts of the film received terrible ratings from test audiences, which led to the novelist Crichton taking over for McTiernan. The resulting film feels disjointed, with an extra(neous) battle scene tacked onto the end, characters introduced and then dropped, and other odd pacing decisions.

Why it’s still cool: Hats off to medieval expert Michael Livingston, whose 2017 article for Reactor thoroughly details the movie’s anachronisms, while still praising the distinctive and unforgettable look of the individual Viking characters, as well as a memorable montage in which ibn Fadlan learns to speak their language. The action sequences can be tense and scary, including a nighttime attack on a village and a harrowing underwater sequence. But, perhaps most important, the movie celebrates people from different cultures overcoming their differences and working together, without speeches or sentimentality. Moreover, the hero is a devout Muslim (and a bit of a nerd), a rare occurrence for a Hollywood film, and a wonderful foil to the Vikings, making this a sort of medieval buddy cop movie.

Bones (2001)

A group of young friends invest in an abandoned house that turns out to be haunted by Jimmy Bones (Snoop Dogg), a gangster who was betrayed and murdered by his associates twenty years earlier. Everyone soon learns that his death reverberates throughout the run-down neighborhood that he once tried to protect—and now, he’s coming back from the dead and looking for revenge.

Why it’s not that good: To be honest, this one came the closest to being left off the list, on the grounds that its coolness may not overcome its flaws. As much as we love Snoop, he just isn’t scary as the villain, especially when he’s dropping lines like “dog eat dog” while killing people. This is one of those horror movies that simply isn’t scary, in any meaningful sense of that word. It’s more like a funhouse, with some magical elements thrown in at the end to help resolve the plot. And on top of all that, the soundtrack is surprisingly bland for a movie starring a hip-hop legend.

Why it’s still cool: Snoop may not be scary, but the design of his costumes, both when he’s living and (un)dead, are pretty cool. There is also a memorable practical effect in this film, in which the “membrane” between our world and hell is depicted as a wall of writhing bodies, covered in an oily black paint that absorbs the light in an eerie way. There’s also a great shot that reminded me of the movie Hereditary, in which Bones’ ghost stands still in a dark corner, like an afterimage. It’s such a shame that beautiful, original shots like those are often followed up with something silly, like a bad CGI projection of Snoop’s face, or a “ghost-vision” view. Still, cinephiles have rediscovered this one thanks to a Blu-Ray release a few years ago. For many reviewers, the movie’s coolness can be found in its grimdark zaniness, as well as its commentary on gentrification, urban blight, family, identity, and generational conflict.

Badland Hunters (2024)

The most recent release in the group, Badland Hunters combines elements of Mad Max, Train to Busan, and John Wick (and its many influences). After an earthquake turns Korea into a wasteland, people struggle to survive in the face of food shortages and gang warfare. Among them are game hunters Ji-wan (Lee Jun-young) and Nam-san (Ma Dong-seok), who help to protect the citizens of a small settlement, including a young woman named Su-na (Roh Jeong-eui). Su-na finds herself trapped in a compound run by a scientist whose bizarre experiments just might be connected to the appearance of zombies roaming the area. While Su-na plots her escape, Nam-san and Ji-wan begin a rescue operation, and discover the true scope of the scientist’s nefarious plan.

Why it’s not that good: There is a factory-made feel to these Netflix movies, and at least one reviewer suggested that Badland’s desert hellscape appears to have been generated via an AI program. The influences for this movie may feel a little too familiar, as the story treads on very well-worn ground, and tries to draw out emotion in some heavy-handed ways.

Why it’s still cool: Director Heo Myeong-haeng stages some beautiful martial arts and gunplay scenes, all of which have an up-close, visceral quality. We feel anger and fear alongside the protagonists as they slash and blast their way through the army of the undead. The big reason for that is Ma’s performance as the stoic hardass who essentially acts as a bulldozing tank, protecting the others while grumbling about what a pain in the ass these damn zombies are. He’s like the gruff veteran first baseman in a softball beer league who can always be counted on to make the right play. Viewers will be glad to find him on their side.


Several movies were left off this list because they were simply good, in my opinion, so they did not need to be cool to compensate. A few other possibilities were just so flawed that their coolness could not salvage them. That left me, however, with a list that skewed heavily toward overly macho stories. Clearly, my subjective understanding of coolness could use some expanding, so I would love to see your suggestions for more movies like these, and particularly ones that feature women or offer a twist on conventional action movies. Stay cool! icon-paragraph-end

  1. Full disclosure: I work for the publishing company that hands out the Word of the Year, though I have little say in it beyond a company-wide vote among several choices. I always vote for the word that ends up losing. ↩︎
  2. I was amused to discover that whoever cut the trailer for Streets of Fire must have also made the trailer for Dune that same year. Both are written the same way, opening with the ominous line: “You are about to enter a world…” ↩︎

About the Author

Robert Repino

Author

Robert Repino (@Repino1) grew up in Drexel Hill, Pennsylvania. After serving in the Peace Corps in Grenada, he earned an MFA in Creative Writing at Emerson College. He works as an editor for Oxford University Press, where his projects include the forthcoming Oxford Handbook of Humanism. He has also taught for the Gotham Writers Workshop. Repino is the author of Spark and the League of Ursus (Quirk Books), as well as the War With No Name series (Soho Press), which includes Mort(e), Culdesac, and D’Arc.
Learn More About
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
29 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments